I have been thinking about this a lot lately- attitude on life. Why do people spend their lives having a negative perception on life? I just don't get it.
I understand that we are all faced with hardships and experiences that can be quite difficult, but it is so important to not let these get us down and to really take it as a challenge; something that won't get you down and that will only make you stronger and grow as an individual.
My aunt always said that her 'default' is being happy. I Love that.. .and I totally believe it is the same with me. I really try and digest this world and the experiences I am presented with in a positive light.
Where does being negative get you in life anyways? Many of our experiences involve other people (jobs, school, marriage, friendship, family, sports, eating, etc.) and you will enjoy all of these experiences so much more by just being positive.
My mother has always told me to do nice things for others and that you will one day have3 nice things done in return to you. Call this karma or whatever, but I 100% believe this and think it speaks truth.
That's my personality lesson for today- now you my be wondering why I'm writing about it.
After having had some conversations with new and interesting people lately, I have come to realize that many people living in Paris- as opposed to many of the other places in the world I have been fortunate to have visited- are actually quite negative and rude. Once again, I must clarify that this is obviously not everyone and it merely is an observation.
Example #1: Girls look at one another up and down most likely criticizing them to bits- call this jealousy or whatever- but it's rude. I must admit, I think we all (including myself) do this to a certain extent, but it just seems to be overt and condescending here.
Example #2: A young- early 20's year old guy was yelling and screaming at his girlfriend in the metro and started getting a little violent with her. I guess people where just minding their own business, but even older and bigger men were walking by and weren't saying or doing anything. I was disgusted- one for this guys behaviour towards his gf, and two because nobody was doing anything.
Example #3: Linked to the previous- you see older women with luggage or women with strollers trying to get their way around town with public transit and I rarely see people help. If I am close enough, I will step in and ask if they'd like some… like 2 hours ago for example, I helped a woman carry her stroller up a large flight of stairs, she was all alone, it was heavy, imagine if I hadn't asked. Yes maybe someone else would have, but I was a distance behind her on the previous flight of stairs and nobody asked.
Example #4: Let me ask you this, do you get up from your seat for someone who looks like they need it more than you do? I find Canadians in general to be quite well mannered when it comes to this, but not the people riding the metro here.
Example#5: While on the metro you can get a general sense of people's moods. If I were to rate the average mood of people on the metro on a scale from 1-10; 1 being crappier than crap and 10 being super duper fantastically happy, I'd rate the average at 3.7. Yes… pathetic.
Example #6: In small neighbourhoods, on an early Saturday afternoon, while going for a walk you will most likely smile or make sort of greeting towards other pedestrians, but not here.
Maybe I've just taken for granted the fact that I've grown up in a place where people are generally quite kind, but I won't anymore. I just hope that it doesn't rub off on me!!!! I've heard that after a while... people who live here get bad attitudes too! I'm going to try and spread the smile instead of the frown! haha
You haven't spent too much time in downtown Vancouver have you? :) One reason that I am glad to be moving out of DT is that people here are rude and impatient. Although I have yet to see someone get borderline violent with their girlfriend....
ReplyDeleteThis sort of thing is pretty common with big cities. You'll be fine, though. You have managed to maintain your sunny disposition even while working for the public service (that usually knocks the sunshine out of everyone).
Farida, welcome to Paris. All of the things you describe are totally normal there. That's why I tried to talk you out of moving there. You will meet some nice people, but generally everyone is miserable, people are rude, and they don't give a shit about anyone else. Just take as an example, a Parisian you know very close to home, someone I know very well, who never really bothers to go out of his way for anyone. Unfortunately, that's the way it is, and even more unfortunately, you'll end up leaving with a lot of negativity too.
ReplyDeleteJust make sure to surround yourself with nice people, and it won;t matter if everyoen you deal with on a day to day basis is an asshole.
Wow, Farida, the attitude there you speak of, surprises me. Unfortunately, I guess they are living up to their reputation...Everything happens for a reason, and maybe that's why you're there! To, one example at a time, show them what is possible; I definitely believe happiness and kindess is contagious! It's like you're laying the foundation of "Paying it Forward" on a daily basis, until it catches on! I totally relate to what you're saying. I was recently out with someone and all she could do was comment on other women. I find it sort of offensive, not to mention extremely catty! I joked with her and hoped she would get the message to stop, after all I was more than happy to check out the men! And strangers helping, there is a real cool tv show on, called "What Would You Do?" where they set up certain situations - like a man being abusive with his girlfriend, in a restaurant. The man was a big guy, husky and 6 feet tall, other men in the restaurant were there, but the one who came to the girl's aid was a pair of women! And they really gave it to the guy good; it brought tears of joy to my eyes....
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